It’s been long overdue since I last posted anything on here. Now that things have begun settling down after the past few months I’m going to try to start updating this blog more often. I’m also in process of creating two other blogs: one about conflict resolution and one about news. We’ll see when those get off the ground but for now I’ll be more active on here.
The reason I’ve been so out of contact the last few months has everything to do with graduating back in May. It’s been a rough road to say the least, but at the same time it has been eye opening and exhilarating. I guess I’ll start by giving a short summary of what I’ve been doing, and then how I feel about it in terms of what I like and what I don’t like, for anyone who reads this that might care.
When you get closer to graduating from college you start to panic. Everyone tells you to panic and everyone tells you it’s going to be hard. About a year before graduation I did my best to circumvent this by looking in to every option I could think of that I’d like to do. I applied for the Peace Corps, but didn’t have enough experience. I did an internship, but that didn’t turn in to anything. I started job applications and informational interviews and whatever networking I could. The biggest problem was though that I didn’t know what I wanted to do. When you don’t have a goal you don’t really get a result.
So then I went in to temp work at the end of July/start of August. It was so stressful I can’t go in to words. It wasn’t necessarily the temp work, but I was in a rough situation since I didn’t really have savings since I used most of them in exchange for getting experience at the last job I was at. That meant that I needed to always be working, at least for a few months. That didn’t happen. It took me a little over a month going through the grinder to land an OK gig at a travel company. From there things got exponentially better, I started tutoring with good pay as well. Currently I’m in the process of accepting an offer at the company as a consultant.
Here’s the thing though, I hate the world I’m seeing after college. In many respects it is rough, unforgiving, competitive, conniving, and dreary. I am no stranger to hardship or hard work. I am not a “millennial who is living in a dreamworld.” I have worked a full-time job since I was in high school. I have lived on my own since I was 18 years old. Yet as time has progressed I have been exposed to different people, education, and workplaces that are real and living proof that there is another way to do things. You can have communication, cooperation, and happiness without sacrificing standard of living or livelihood. Yet most people I have met since temping at different companies don’t believe this. And that belief perpetuates the cycle of cruelty and inequality.
This brings me to my second point. While there are many things I see which I don’t like, it has helped me find what I’m passionate about and what I want to pursue as a career and as a person. In many ways it has always been my passion and interest yet now it is much more defined. I want to spread conflict resolution in the most effective ways possible. I want to train groups and organizations. I want to mediate disputes and facilitate dialogue.
I want to be a messenger of transformation.
Or in less figurative and narcissistic language I want to be involved in conflict resolution through training, mediation, facilitation, and outreach. I’m looking into consultancy and other avenues.
That’s only part of it though. I think the most important thing in life is to be happy. Life is too hard and full of grief for anything else. The arguments I have heard against this are to aid to the improvement of society. I think that’s a noble goal and I’ve been driven by that myself. At the same time I’ve become disillusioned to this end. Society is too unpredictable, too competitive, and filled with unintended misery for that to be someones whole purpose for life. I have a lot more thoughts on this but we’ll save that for another time.
Anyways, I am looking to spend my life doing what makes me happy. This includes helping others be happy and spending time with who I love. I’m planning on writing a post soon on how I’m looking to get there. I’m starting that pursuit right now.